Chapter 1, Lesson 3: What are the Primary Teachings?

Welcome to Lesson 3 of Finding Your Way.  In this lesson, we’re going to discuss the primary teachings for this course.  These are the two understandings that I view as the most important teachings in this course.  Everything else in the course can be viewed as a tool or frame by which to achieve a greater understanding of these two key concepts.  So what are they?  I’ll describe each of them briefly here, and then go into them in much more depth throughout the remainder of the course.

#1: We each manifest our reality based on our beliefs  

This teaching is by far the hardest to truly internalize.  When I say that we each manifest our reality based on our beliefs, I don’t mean this metaphorically, but quite literally.  Over the remainder of this course, I will methodically walk you through the ways in which this teaching is true at every level.  There are also many additional understandings that arise once this lesson has been internalized.  For example, a key related understanding is that you can only experience the things that you are energetically resonant with – that some part of you is expressing.  At its fullest, this understanding, coupled with some of the techniques taught in this course, will yield an increasing ability to coordinate your reality for your personal benefit and the benefit of all beings, ultimately leading at the end of this course to coming into a deep trust in yourself and your ability to shape your own destiny.

#2: To live a wholesome and happy life and to help heal the world, move with the Five Heavenly Virtues 

Part of the purpose of this course is to help create a community of people who wish to heal themselves and grow as much as possible.  Having done so, I hope they will turn outwards and help others to heal, ultimately healing the world and building heaven on Earth.  I see heaven on Earth as a harmonious society, in which suffering is as limited as is possible, and all beings have an opportunity to express themselves and create to the full extent of their capacities and interests. In such a society, people treat themselves and each other with kindness and respect, truly wishing everyone well, caring about each other’s wellbeing, sharing in each other’s joys and successes, avoiding blind reactivity in their interactions, and respecting each other’s autonomy and individual worth.

The Five Heavenly Virtues are the five ways of moving that, when collectively applied to any situation, will lead to a harmonious result.  The first four of those virtues are the wholesome virtues of Buddhism, known as the Brahmaviharas.  They are:

Metta: loving-kindness or benevolence. Metta means having unconditional love for all beings.  Everyone, at their core, is a buddha self - a being of pure love and unity.  It is only their fear and their karma – the largely unconscious movements of clinging, craving and aversion – that lead people to act cruelly towards others.  True unconditional love, even towards those who have wronged us or those we dislike, is something that is difficult for most people to fully embrace. Yet the benefits of cultivating unconditional love towards all beings are enormous. As love blossoms in our hearts towards all beings, so much less time is spent telling ourselves painful stories, ruminating on past slights, or anticipating future ones. All of those things steadily drop away, and we become much more connected, much more present in every moment, enjoying what presents itself, and seeing the positive in all situations.

The second Virtue is Karuna: compassion for suffering. Karuna means seeing suffering and having compassion for that suffering as a felt experience, not just as words. Karuna involves having compassion not just for the suffering of others, but also for our own suffering. Often, we are our own harshest critic; the development of karuna inevitably begins to create space for forgiveness, both of others and of ourselves. As our understanding of karuna grows, we begin to move through the world in a more gentle fashion, forgiving ourselves for our past mistakes, and forgiving those we interact with for theirs. We become keenly aware of the suffering of others in a way that does not give rise to our own suffering. Instead, we move from a place of metta to alleviate that noticed suffering as we see it arise.

This word – karuna – is worth remembering. There is no word in the English language that accurately and concisely conveys heartfelt compassion for suffering the way karuna does.  Indeed, when someone describes to me a hardship they are experiencing, my go-to word in response is “karuna” (assuming they know what that means).  It says “I hear what you are telling me and have compassion for the difficulties you are experiencing.  I empathize with your pain.”  Words like “sorry” damage sovereignty, and phrases like “my condolences” are so narrowly used by society as to almost inevitably summon images of tragedy and loss when used.  Karuna, while empathetically resonant with the pain being experienced, is a word that is inherently filled with light and the prospect of redemption.

Next is Mudita: shared joy - taking joy in another's joy. Like all of the Virtues, mudita is a movement away from separateness, towards unity. By seeing another’s joy and having that spark our own joy, we are moving away from the jealousy, schadenfreude and negativity that society has until now largely encouraged, and towards a unity of shared joy. As our understanding of mudita develops, we start finding joy in every moment. Delighting in another’s delight leads us to actively seek out ways to increase others’ happiness. As mudita blossoms into its fullness, we begin to experience the quiet and powerful shared joy that all consciousness possesses as a result of simply existing: the delight in supporting each other in exploration and growth, and the delight in collectively rising to new heights of existence.

The fourth Virtue is Upekka: equanimity in all things. By practicing upekka, we are developing non-reactivity in the moment. Life presents us with endless catalyst – endless opportunities for learning and growth; and while we always have the choice of how to react, too often an unconscious and unwholesome reaction can arise in response, due to overwhelm in the moment. In orienting towards equanimity, we begin to catch those moments of unconscious overwhelm that frequently occur in response to the things life throws at us, where we fall into a karma and repeat certain unhelpful patterns.  As a result, we begin to move more consciously and with more intentionality through our life. Upekka acts as the cradle in which the first three Heavenly Virtues are able to flourish. With a well-developed sense of equanimity, we can experience each of the first three Virtues to their fullness without becoming overwhelmed by the emotions that arise, and without being frequently drawn by blind reaction into less wholesome patterns of behavior.

The four Brahmaviharas are incredibly valuable tools that collectively can lead to a wholesome state of existence. However, they are not enough on their own to create a truly harmonious society.  If society were to only move with the four Brahmaviharas, there would still be space for hierarchies and control structures to exist within society, allowing dominance and submission to continue its hold on our culture.  Inevitably, this would give rise to situations that result in violation of the Brahmaviharas themselves.  

To avoid this, I teach a fifth Virtue, that I view as essential for a truly harmonious society to form:

Sovereignty: we are all equal and deserving of respect. Sovereignty is a concept that many have not considered in great depth. It is the belief that all beings are intrinsically equal, share the same intrinsic self-worth and are accordingly deserving of the same intrinsic respect as beings of worth. As sovereignty develops, we begin to see that rigid hierarchies and control structures are not necessary or helpful, and instead in combination with the other Virtues, more egalitarian and consensus-based organizational and governance structures can successfully arise and prosper. 

When our sovereignty is violated, it is often due to one or more dependent connections in our experience.  Dependent connections are situations in which one being uses its energy to help another being hide or cling.  They are inherently unwholesome, since no one involved is benefited by the arrangement; the being providing the energy is drained for the purpose of helping the recipient avoid growth.  Dependent connections currently arise in many facets of family life, platonic and business relationships, romantic partnerships, and society at large, and as we become more familiar with our sovereignty, we learn how to shed those in ways that respect ourselves and the others involved, moving with kindness and equanimity.  To learn more about dependent connections, I recommend you read the article linked in the additional resources section of this lesson entitled “Cutting the Cords:  A Deep Dive into Dependent Connections and How to Break Free.”     

With a well-developed understanding of sovereignty, we become able to treat each other equally regardless of respective station in life.  We see that it is unwholesome to place any being on a pedestal – to elevate them above us in our minds.  And we see that it is similarly unwholesome to view any being as inferior and below us in our minds. We see that every being has the same worth as every other being, and the difference is only in the roles we are choosing to play in this incarnation. That is true of humans, animals, spirits and gods. We understand that the gods are not above us, they are just different from us, and they serve in their own way, just as we do. They can be interacted with as peers – partners in this amazing co-creation of reality in which we are all participating. And this course will teach you how.  We are all important parts of creation.

Except for metta, each Virtue, on its own, can become unwholesome if not balanced by the others.  When karuna lacks sovereignty, the excess compassion can lead to martyrdom.  Mudita without equanimity and sovereignty can lead to a clinging desire to please everyone at our own expense.  Upekka without metta, karuna and mudita can lead to a cold and sterile mode of existence, in which emotional experience is flat and dead.  Equanimity without sovereignty leads to submissiveness.  Sovereignty itself can easily lead to selfishness and cruelty, if not joined always with equanimity and kindness.  When joined together, the Virtues strengthen and buttress each other, allowing a thoughtful, mature and kind mode of interaction between all beings — a true heaven on Earth.

We will discuss each of the Five Virtues in much more detail in Chapter 3, as well as a number of real-world examples and exercises that will help you to connect with each of them and learn how they can work together effectively.  We will discuss manifesting our reality in considerable depth in Chapter 7, where we learn about what magic really is and how to work with it most effectively.

At the end of this course, you will have an understanding of how to shape your own reality, as well as an understanding of how to move with the Five Virtues as the basis for the wholesome reality you are learning to create.  

In the next lesson, I will help you to clear your energy and be in a calm and open frame of mind for learning.  We will also work on setting your intentions for the course, so that you can begin to manifest the results you want in an intentional way.  Along the way, you will receive your first transmission, which is a tool that will help you to center yourself much more easily going forward.  Until then, be well.